Sunday, 24 May 2009

Sunday Scribblings "Worry"

I have been tired this week. Don't really know why because I am usually fairly busy but this week I am tired. Probably the few nights I stayed in Wagga during my daughter's surgery put my sleep cycles out of whack. Her surgery went well, she is young and healthy so is getting over it quite easily. Worried about the scarring that will mark her pretty little flat tummy. Will get her some oil to rub on it. I am taking her back to Wagga today, when she gets out of bed.
How the hell did I raise such untidy kids. Her stuff is scattered all around the house. Her brothers are messy too. I should have been more bossy with them and did less of the housework myself. It was not as if I didn't try to teach them how to be tidy or clean up after themselves. I am a cleaner, maybe that is my life's work. He he. Ah well.
Worry? Yes that is a given isn't it? It is something we all do. No matter how hard we try to fight it, it always comes back to bite us on the bum, when we least need to have it waste our precious time.
I remember when I was 17 I made a trip to Brisbane to visit my sister who was working and living up there at the time. I had the use of her car and crashed it. A big furniture truck was in the left lane and turning left and I was trying to turn right into a busy six lane road. The lights at the intersection up the road were red and there was nothing coming so I thought that I was o.k and pulled out, and crunch, a car was beside the truck, I didn't see and I got it. I had to take the car to my sister and fess up. I had to get a loan to pay for the repairs, my sister had to catch the bus, the lady in the other car got a minor cut on her finger and I did the "what if" thing that drives us all mad when we do something wrong. I learned from that about worrying after the event.
No you can't turn the clock back. You can't go back to the "what ifs" and think If I had just turned left and not right and gone around the block and though the lights instead of trying to turn right. If that truck had not been so low to the ground and I could have seen under it.
If, If, If.....How bloody destructive and self defeating the "what ifs" can be.
How they can make you cry your heart out and still can't change the facts. I vowed then that I would never put myself through them again. That was my most serious car crash. I have backed into a couple of posts and someone ran into the back of me once but other than the Brisbane crash I have been lucky, or was that skill or caution. My kids say I drive like an old lady. They didn't know what a hoon I was when I was younger. He he. There was nothing I loved more than sliding and skidding around corners and spinning around in the mud on the stock reserves.
When I first started going out with Peter he used to sink down in the seat when I drove like that, everybody used to turn around and stare because it was a girl driving and they expected to see a young bloke and not a girl and I thought that was hilarious. Now I shake my head at people who drive like that and say I am glad that it is their tyres and petrol they are using. I must be getting old, he he. Country kids get to play like that and the city kids learn to drive differently. The road rules have all tightened up since I was a kid too.
But... of course , the what ifs always come back to haunt you next time around don't they. In hindsight.

What if I had been tougher,
If I tried harder,
If I was stronger,
If I did it differently,
If I was not weaker,
If I just gave in,
If I had been softer?

A myriad of what ifs.
Round and round in circles,
Biting your own bum,
Gets you absolutely nowhere,
But....what if?

So here is an annoying cliche for you.
"Why Worry?"
It gets you nowhere. But yes we all still do worry. It is human nature.
Better go and get that girl out of bed and back on the road.
Love Linda.


Winterwood said...

why worry be happy... those words froman old song....

Shadow said...

too many what if's.... i'm a worrier too if i don't catch myself. so, just for today, let's not worry, 'kay?

BJ Roan said...

We always worry about our kids, and unfortunately still worry as they get older. My daughter's room was always a horrible mess, but now she is a neat freak. Go figure!

Annie said...

Hi Linda,

Thanks for your good words at my post. All hugs most welcome. As I visit here for the first time, I'm glad to read that all went well with your daughter's surgery. As we say in the U.S. - She dodged that bullet. Do you have a similar saying in Aus?

Worrying and What-ifs are a plague on humanity. All my own worrying lately has just lead to some miserable angry feelings and of course that hurts no one except oneself. The good news is that DH and I had a good talk tonight and now things are less of a worry and more of a "well, that's just the way it is." Of course, it also helps to be in the same corner with your loved one. Cryptic but I think you probably get the drift.

Annie said...

And Hi again to you. Annie at Bimbimbie is one of my favorites. She is such a nice lady and I love her backyard with all of the birds and creatures. And you have a daughter named Annie. I'm just surrounded by Aussie Annies. Love it.

I'm preparing a post for Mellow Yellow Monday which actually address a bit of my worry and some improvements that have emerged.

If you ever what to correspond beyond the comments, my email is visible for you to use.

All my best,
Annie in California

Beth said...

Loved the wild flashback as well as the list poem of "what ifs". We do all have them, and considering our choices, my only healing remark is one I learned from my mother, painful years ago: Each person does the very best he or she can do at that time. Now, that daughter needs you, and it's pretty apparent you love her. And you are being supportive . . . My daughter was equally messy, that is until she got married. Somehow she became all I'd hoped after her rebellious years. How this Sunday Scribblings' prompt pushed us to reveal our worries about those we love!

Dee Martin said...

What if? You wouldn't be who you are writing this post if those what ifs were true :)

Marja said...

You had something to worry about with your daughter in hospital and yes worry is human. I think everything happens for a reason and also from the bad things in life we learn lessons although that doesn't make it any easier
What if you spoil yourself today
take care

Annie said... - I don't mind sharing. Since your email is not visible, here is mine.


Marguerite said...

Glad to hear your daughter is recuperating from the surgery. I think worry is very common, especially when we have kids. This was another good post.

Bimbimbie said...

Great news that your daughter is doing well following her op ... you can always hope now that she's on the mend she'll develop tidier ways*!*

Linda I have to confess I'm a born worrywort, hubby reckons this should become my signature song, thanks Monty Pythons ;)

I'm so worried about what's hapenin' today, in the middle east, you know
And I'm worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow
I'm so worried about the fashions today, I don't think they're good for your feet
And I'm so worried about the shows on TV that sometimes they want to repeat

I'm so worried about what's happenin' today, you know
And I'm worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow
I'm so worried about my hair falling out and the state of the world today
And I'm so worried about bein' so full of doubt about everything, anyway

I'm so worried about modern technology
I'm so worried about all the things that they dump in the sea
I'm so worried about it, worried about it, worried, worried, worried

I'm so worried about everything that can go wrong
I'm so worried about whether people like this song
I'm so worried about this very next verse, it isn't the best that I've got
And I'm so worried about whether I should go on, or whether I should just stop

I'm worried about whether I ought to have stopped
And I'm worried about, it's the sort of thing I ought to know
And I'm worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow

I'm so worried about whether I should have stopped then
I'm so worried that I'm driving everyone 'round the bend
I'm worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow

Anonymous said...

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